OK, so for a while, i have been calling my kids by their ages, because from so many blogger's I was told that it was a very bad idea to put their names out there for complete strangers to know.
well after a lot of thinking, i think its OK to go ahead and call them by their names, lol.
so our kids are:
16 y.o =Josh
12 y.o = Andrew
9 y.o = Kiera
7 y.o = Lily
6 y.o = Izeah
4 y.o = Anthony
Husb = Will
Me = Lily
the last few days...
well needless to say, we were home all weekend.
with 6 y.o still having nose bleed issues, and husb having duty , it was the kids and me again at home.
sunday, i finally crashed, my migraines and depression got the best of me, it's on my depression blog; so i dont type it twice.
monday and tuesday were no different from this whole week. i have been with the 6 y.o and his episodes, and alone with all of the kids while husb is at work.
hopefully tomorrow is better than this last week.
i am extremely anxious, 6 y.o has a doc appt at 9am, and i dont know what diagnosis they will have this time. the diagnosis dont change every time, there just seems to be a new one everytime.
how much can a 6 year old handle? even more so, how much can this mother handle?
on a brighter note, my 7 y.o has something amazing happening today (wednesday) in school.....
her WONDERFUL teacher is cooking a thanksgiving day lunch/dinner for the class.
amazing!! she is cooking 2 turkey's and parents are pitching in side items.
7 y.o could not stop bragging about her daddy's red garlic mashed potatoes, so she signed him up for that, lol.
my 6 y.o doc appt is at 9am so i hope so much i can make it back in time to be with her for this event. she is soo excited, and yes, i can finally have pictures up, lol.
with 6 y.o still having nose bleed issues, and husb having duty , it was the kids and me again at home.
sunday, i finally crashed, my migraines and depression got the best of me, it's on my depression blog; so i dont type it twice.
monday and tuesday were no different from this whole week. i have been with the 6 y.o and his episodes, and alone with all of the kids while husb is at work.
hopefully tomorrow is better than this last week.
i am extremely anxious, 6 y.o has a doc appt at 9am, and i dont know what diagnosis they will have this time. the diagnosis dont change every time, there just seems to be a new one everytime.
how much can a 6 year old handle? even more so, how much can this mother handle?
on a brighter note, my 7 y.o has something amazing happening today (wednesday) in school.....
her WONDERFUL teacher is cooking a thanksgiving day lunch/dinner for the class.
amazing!! she is cooking 2 turkey's and parents are pitching in side items.
7 y.o could not stop bragging about her daddy's red garlic mashed potatoes, so she signed him up for that, lol.
my 6 y.o doc appt is at 9am so i hope so much i can make it back in time to be with her for this event. she is soo excited, and yes, i can finally have pictures up, lol.
caught in the blurr......
haven't been on since friday, haven't had my mind with me since before that, lol.
it has just been such a whirlwind year.
financially we have been so under the bus that in the mail today i got a letter from the city treasurer because we are so late on our sewer bill, and a disconnect notice from the water company for unpaid water bill. i know the gas and electric bill are right there too.
health wise, it seems that as soon as we moved to this house in june, it has been accident after accident after sickness.
i just can not catch a break!!!!!!!!!!!
it has just been such a whirlwind year.
financially we have been so under the bus that in the mail today i got a letter from the city treasurer because we are so late on our sewer bill, and a disconnect notice from the water company for unpaid water bill. i know the gas and electric bill are right there too.
health wise, it seems that as soon as we moved to this house in june, it has been accident after accident after sickness.
i just can not catch a break!!!!!!!!!!!
trying hard to hang in there...........
i feel like i have to make myself numb from my own emotions, otherwise i would completely loose all grasp of any sanity i have left.
its 430am on friday morning. my last few weeks have been full of no sleep, and constant stress over the kids being sick.
the night before last, i was home alone with the kids, while husb. was on duty. on the dot, as soon as will said on the phone that he would be on his way home, 6y.o nose started bleeding.
let me tell you, this is the same kid who has had random nose bleeds for a couple of years, so a normal nose bleed is something i will not TOTALLY freak out about, lol.
he screamed "mommy!!" and i turned to look at him, and he was picking up his head from the pillow (he had been sleeping on the couch next to me that night) and there was blood just flowing from his nose. now im not exagerrating here, i mean i little constant river of stuff, i freaked out.
i was putting pressure and anything else i can remember, but it was not working,
long story short.....
husb and I got into a argument , because i kept trying to tell him i needed to take my baby to the e.r, and he wouldnt understand.
all 5'3" of me is all nice and shy, until you disagree with me about my kids getting seen by a doctor. i was loud and LOUD!, after a few minutes, got all the kids in the car and went to the hospital.
we got there at 130am, and we got home at 730am. the e.r doctor kept "assuring" me that my son picked his nose in his sleep and thats what the bl**d was from.
i know my son, i know that because of his "personal routines" he sleeps with his hands pressed under his own weight to sleep, so theres no way he could have done that, but because he had a medical degree and i didnt, i gave him the benefit of the doubt.
he told me not to take him to his doctor because it was a regular "nose picking cut". that it "should" not happen again.
weds
730am we got home from the hospital
1042am his nose started again, while napping on the couch
320pm nose starts while sitting on my lap watching tv,
645 nose starts while we are eating dinner
1030pm nose starts while hes trying to fall asleep
thurs
2am nose starts while sleeping on my bed
430am nose starts while sleeping again
at 9am i called pediatrics and spoke to a nurse, told her the whole schedule and gave me an appointment for 1045am.
we got there and the doctor tried to say "its from a nose picking incident its likely"
i got upset and told the doctor, i see the flow comming from way back of the nose, not where he showed me the cut at. i also told him the amount of "ooze" that comes out, its just no way that it could be from a tiny cut, not when i saw that its comming from the back of the nose.
especially the large amount of it, wich is my biggest concern
for a 6 year old, to "ooze" that much for that often, is too much.
so the doctor told me that he will take my word and was going to have bloodwork done to see blood cell counts and a number of other things.
he said he will call me as soon as he gets the results and let me know if its something that he has to be admitted for.
since we have been home, he had more episodes...
230pm
5pm
1030pm
so the kids and i were about to have dinner, and the 4 y.o asked if we could say grace, he said grace and when we let go of our hands the 6 y.o said he wanted to say a prayer, so i said go ahead baby, and this was his prayer....
"dear god, please help me get better soon so i dont die, amen"
it broke my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i could not stop sobbing.
how do you keep your composture after hearing your baby say that?!?!?
its 430am on friday morning. my last few weeks have been full of no sleep, and constant stress over the kids being sick.
the night before last, i was home alone with the kids, while husb. was on duty. on the dot, as soon as will said on the phone that he would be on his way home, 6y.o nose started bleeding.
let me tell you, this is the same kid who has had random nose bleeds for a couple of years, so a normal nose bleed is something i will not TOTALLY freak out about, lol.
he screamed "mommy!!" and i turned to look at him, and he was picking up his head from the pillow (he had been sleeping on the couch next to me that night) and there was blood just flowing from his nose. now im not exagerrating here, i mean i little constant river of stuff, i freaked out.
i was putting pressure and anything else i can remember, but it was not working,
long story short.....
husb and I got into a argument , because i kept trying to tell him i needed to take my baby to the e.r, and he wouldnt understand.
all 5'3" of me is all nice and shy, until you disagree with me about my kids getting seen by a doctor. i was loud and LOUD!, after a few minutes, got all the kids in the car and went to the hospital.
we got there at 130am, and we got home at 730am. the e.r doctor kept "assuring" me that my son picked his nose in his sleep and thats what the bl**d was from.
i know my son, i know that because of his "personal routines" he sleeps with his hands pressed under his own weight to sleep, so theres no way he could have done that, but because he had a medical degree and i didnt, i gave him the benefit of the doubt.
he told me not to take him to his doctor because it was a regular "nose picking cut". that it "should" not happen again.
weds
730am we got home from the hospital
1042am his nose started again, while napping on the couch
320pm nose starts while sitting on my lap watching tv,
645 nose starts while we are eating dinner
1030pm nose starts while hes trying to fall asleep
thurs
2am nose starts while sleeping on my bed
430am nose starts while sleeping again
at 9am i called pediatrics and spoke to a nurse, told her the whole schedule and gave me an appointment for 1045am.
we got there and the doctor tried to say "its from a nose picking incident its likely"
i got upset and told the doctor, i see the flow comming from way back of the nose, not where he showed me the cut at. i also told him the amount of "ooze" that comes out, its just no way that it could be from a tiny cut, not when i saw that its comming from the back of the nose.
especially the large amount of it, wich is my biggest concern
for a 6 year old, to "ooze" that much for that often, is too much.
so the doctor told me that he will take my word and was going to have bloodwork done to see blood cell counts and a number of other things.
he said he will call me as soon as he gets the results and let me know if its something that he has to be admitted for.
since we have been home, he had more episodes...
230pm
5pm
1030pm
so the kids and i were about to have dinner, and the 4 y.o asked if we could say grace, he said grace and when we let go of our hands the 6 y.o said he wanted to say a prayer, so i said go ahead baby, and this was his prayer....
"dear god, please help me get better soon so i dont die, amen"
it broke my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i could not stop sobbing.
how do you keep your composture after hearing your baby say that?!?!?
PITBULL KISSIES....
i just had to post this picture, one of my many thoughts that have been in my head lately.
it hurts so much to see the mean and judging looks people give us when we take max out with us in public.
i took max out with me in september and a cocker spaniel attacked me. but my pitbull gets categorized as a violent dog?!?!?!!? ignorance!!!!!!!!!!!
look at this picture and tell me how dangerous he looks?!?!?!?!?!
he loves my kids, looks for them to cuddle with, its a shame that all you hear and see are pictures of the terrible things these breeds do, but u dont see this picture often..................
it hurts so much to see the mean and judging looks people give us when we take max out with us in public.
i took max out with me in september and a cocker spaniel attacked me. but my pitbull gets categorized as a violent dog?!?!?!!? ignorance!!!!!!!!!!!
look at this picture and tell me how dangerous he looks?!?!?!?!?!
he loves my kids, looks for them to cuddle with, its a shame that all you hear and see are pictures of the terrible things these breeds do, but u dont see this picture often..................
our parentless saturday......
ok so the whole saturday wasnt without parents, but i guess you can say we took shifts, because it was one parent at a time with the kids today.
saturday i didnt wake up until noon, i was up all night with our 6 y.o. i woke up and will had already given breakfast and was starting lunch for him and the other kids as me n 6y.o were still asleep.
i got ready because i had a docs appt in 1 hr, and after that i went to get groceries.
will stayed home with the kids nad they straightened up the house and watched movies.
after we took will to the docs appt where he had to spend the night at, the kids and i came home.
the kids were really sad, mainly the girls were cause the boys were over it. we ate the dinner their daddy cooked for them. that was a traditional puerto rican special dish. called a benir and he made them red rice with it too. his moms recepie. the kids mood was down,. so i let them have a special dessert, oreo cheesecake, and after that we threw blankets and pillows on the floor and watched the movie "underdog"
nice way to end the night for the kids, for me it was a different story, different blog, lol....
saturday i didnt wake up until noon, i was up all night with our 6 y.o. i woke up and will had already given breakfast and was starting lunch for him and the other kids as me n 6y.o were still asleep.
i got ready because i had a docs appt in 1 hr, and after that i went to get groceries.
will stayed home with the kids nad they straightened up the house and watched movies.
after we took will to the docs appt where he had to spend the night at, the kids and i came home.
the kids were really sad, mainly the girls were cause the boys were over it. we ate the dinner their daddy cooked for them. that was a traditional puerto rican special dish. called a benir and he made them red rice with it too. his moms recepie. the kids mood was down,. so i let them have a special dessert, oreo cheesecake, and after that we threw blankets and pillows on the floor and watched the movie "underdog"
nice way to end the night for the kids, for me it was a different story, different blog, lol....
friday?
where did my mind just go? i suddenly cant remember what i did friday.
oh yeah, now i remember why i cant remember, drama!
we got the car back finally on weds and i had to go get my prescription filled that i had in my pocket for almost 2 week, and for a chance for me to finally get out of this house! so thursday came n i was too depressed and crying to go out in public.... ANGRY!!!!!!
so thurs i planned for friday, we had an appt on base and i was gonna have a chance to get my meds.
friday morning after i sent the kids to school i was gonna swing by and pick W up for his appt and my meds. anthony and i went to get him and he never picked up the phone or answered my texts. then i also remembered he kept the bank card. UPSETTING! now, last time i went to pick him up for an appt he left on a trouble call and never made it to his appt, so this time i waited til 915am and had no choice but to go back home n wait because i didnt even have 1 dllr on me.
loooooooong story short, from 1045am til 3pm we fought non stop through the phone. i didnt know where he was and he wouldnt give me straight answers. i wound up picking him up at the mall at 3pm. needless to say, i was PISSED OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!
so i went off and that led to war time in the car.
picked up the kids, got dinner and cant remember the rest.
what an eventful friday huh?
ON A GREAT NOTE, IZEAH GOT A BLUE CARD AT SCHOOL TODAY, FOR BEING GOOD ALL DAY LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! second one he has had all year so im excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh yeah, now i remember why i cant remember, drama!
we got the car back finally on weds and i had to go get my prescription filled that i had in my pocket for almost 2 week, and for a chance for me to finally get out of this house! so thursday came n i was too depressed and crying to go out in public.... ANGRY!!!!!!
so thurs i planned for friday, we had an appt on base and i was gonna have a chance to get my meds.
friday morning after i sent the kids to school i was gonna swing by and pick W up for his appt and my meds. anthony and i went to get him and he never picked up the phone or answered my texts. then i also remembered he kept the bank card. UPSETTING! now, last time i went to pick him up for an appt he left on a trouble call and never made it to his appt, so this time i waited til 915am and had no choice but to go back home n wait because i didnt even have 1 dllr on me.
loooooooong story short, from 1045am til 3pm we fought non stop through the phone. i didnt know where he was and he wouldnt give me straight answers. i wound up picking him up at the mall at 3pm. needless to say, i was PISSED OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!
so i went off and that led to war time in the car.
picked up the kids, got dinner and cant remember the rest.
what an eventful friday huh?
ON A GREAT NOTE, IZEAH GOT A BLUE CARD AT SCHOOL TODAY, FOR BEING GOOD ALL DAY LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! second one he has had all year so im excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!
once again i have gone away, but im back ;)
trying to maanage my home life, and my depression has been extremely hard, i have been very down for a while, and i have once again decided to continue with my blogs to help me get awarness out of depression and its effects, also, bipolar phase 2, and also just to keep an arm out in the world ;)
we have done so much since the last time i blogged, but i will catch you up as i have time, i will also become more active on my other blog, for depression....
thankies fro reading ;)
we have done so much since the last time i blogged, but i will catch you up as i have time, i will also become more active on my other blog, for depression....
thankies fro reading ;)
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